Anything You've Learned You Can Unlearn

A few weeks ago a client who's recently started meditating and working on her self care confided in me that while she gets it's "good for her" the more self awareness she builds, the more frustrated she's getting.

Oh, I've been there. Maybe you have, too?

You learn all about some new life improvement strategy
You buy the books and listen to the podcasts

But when it comes time to do the thing you struggle to be consistent & that new level of self-awareness means you know you're messing it up. If you're like most of the clients I've worked with you flail for a little while, get frustrated, and feel like a failure.

It happens to all of us - myself included.

Today I want to talk about an underlying belief that has been used by coaches and motivational speakers for years and is one of the foundational ideas of Neurolinguistic Programming. It also builds on the recent blog post that you are not your thoughts.

If you're struggling with your own limiting beliefs, feeling like a failure whenever you trip up a bit, or recent gains in self-awareness have you down - this one's for you!

Be safe & well out there,
Darlene

Anything Your Mind Has Learned
it Can Unlearn

Let's talk neurology for a second:

When your brain experiences something for the first time your synapses (the connections between the neurons in your brain) fire in a way they've never fired before. If you keep experiencing that same thing again and again that new firing pattern will continue to go off.

But the brain is savvy. It doesn't want to waste resources. And that first firing pattern is messy - it's taking the long way around because it's not sure what to do that first time. The more the pattern fires the more new shortcuts the brain will find. It'll reinforce the 'quick way' and shut down any extra waste. Over time this is how our deeply ingrained habits form. They're based on routines that have been neurologically reinforced.

But there's good news, too:

These old, reinforced patterns can be rewired.

People are highly adaptable. We can choose new habits and new beliefs.

And every time we reinforce the new habit the old one weakens a little bit... the next time a little bit more. Over time the new habit (or belief if it's a way of thinking) gets rewritten into the new, affirming, positive behavior that we want for ourselves.

Why is this such a big deal?

Think of a time in your life that you really wanted something and struggled to make it happen.

Changing your lifestyle
Confidence
Success at work
How you feel about your relationships

Underneath whatever you just thought of is your beliefs about how the world works - including about yourself. Every self limiting belief you've ever had is steeped in thoughts you've been taught over your lifetime.

Some people go through their lives not believing that change is possible because they think they can't change - or they've put limits on what it's possible to change.
If you can accept the idea that anything the brain has learned
can be unlearned and rewired that means that any change becomes possible
and anything you want to achieve becomes possible.

Of every belief I coach people on I believe this is the most important one.
Period.

I'm not saying it's easy.

Just that it's vitally important to your success if changing your lifestyle or habits is something you want for yourself.

#believeinyourself